Dating With Purpose 101


Sis, let’s talk about dating!


As a Christian woman, when it comes to dating, your focus should be to date with purpose. The world’s way of dating is about pleasure but God’s way is about purpose. Dating with purpose means that you are not dating just to do it, there is a purpose behind it. There is an end goal and you are not surrendering yourself and your destiny to a man who doesn’t align with God’s Word about who he should be.


I don’t know about you but I look back over the times when I was so hopeful for a situation to work out that I didn’t want to accept the truth. The truth was that the person was not God’s best for me and they weren’t even interested in a real commitment. Sis, I don’t want that for you! I want you to be in an awesome relationship and marriage that glorifies God and is everything that you desire.


Here are a few tips that I’ve learned along the way as it relates to dating with purpose:


1. Seek God on if you should be dating right now and follow His instructions


Social media has a way of making you feel like you’re missing out on something, especially when it comes to relationships. But the truth is that what you see on social media, is only a small portion of a person’s life and that’s if what they are posting is actually true. The Lord knows what is best for you and He will always lead you in the right direction. You might think it is the right time for you to be in a relationship but there may be some things in your heart that need to be worked out first. So pray and ask the Lord if it is the right time and whatever His response is, just follow it because He never fails!


2. Don’t compromise or settle for being just another option!


Listen sis, I have played the role of just another option before and it is not pretty! In my experience, this type of situation always causes stress and ends up in heartbreak. Now that I am about to get married to an amazing man of God, I now know what it is like when a man is not only serious about a woman, but he has fruit to show it. He also has fruit to show his relationship with the Lord and that fruit is consistent and genuine. Think about your relationship with the Lord. Have you ever felt like just another person He created with no value or purpose? Have you ever felt like He lied when He said He loved you? I’m pretty sure that your answers are no to both of those questions and that is because your Father loves you more than you will ever know and every day He is chasing after you to show it to you. You are a daughter of the Most High King and His love for you goes beyond any love you will experience from another human being. So don’t settle or compromise. Just like God shows you how much He loves you and is committed to you, a man who says that he is interested in you should do the same!


3. Keep your wholeness journey a priority!


A relationship should never take the place of or take precedence over your wholeness journey. This is so important to remember because you can easily fall into the trap of giving into someone’s opinions about who you should be and what you should do instead of continuing on the path that God has set for you. Wholeness in itself is a major factor in dating with purpose because, if you don’t know who you are in Christ, it will be easier for you to allow someone else to define who you are. This will cause you to jump from relationship to relationship trying to find love and validation when God already loves you and has already validated you. Be committed to your wholeness journey and don’t allow anyone to take you off course.


4. Have a strong, like-minded community to give you wisdom and hold you accountable.


When I was trying online dating, I had a few people that I kept in the loop about everything I was doing. This might seem like too much to some people however I knew the importance of having the right community to walk with me along the journey. I wanted to make sure that I wasn’t missing red flags but that I also wasn’t overthinking. You want to have people in your circle that are not just giving you an opinion but are giving you sound wisdom. You need people that know and live by the Word of God so that they will not try and steer you in the wrong direction. Your community should hold you accountable when it comes to your relationship with the Lord, especially in the area of dating with purpose.

My desire for you is to experience what it is like when God sends you His best. I want you to experience what it is like to not have to compromise or settle but instead be in a relationship with a real man of God who is committed to pleasing the Lord. I want you to experience what it is like to join in covenant with a man of God and fulfill the purpose that God has for you both to fulfill together.


God’s plan for you is greater than anything you can imagine so continue to seek after Him because His promises are Yes and Amen!


For no matter how many promises God has made, they are “Yes” in Christ.

2 Corinthians 1:20